January 30th, 2008 by tziaaa

Some camwhore pic at work place.
enjoy yea! 

..
….
……

 

January 29th, 2008 by tziaaa

Celine visited us today =)
 

I really tried to let go everything just like that.
Thank you for keep holding me back.
Thank you for not giving up in me.
I want you back badly. All i need is you. =)
I couldn’t survive even one day without you.
I know I will regret if I don’t go back to you.
You are my everything darling. Keep your promises.
Promise me not to lied to me & hiding things from me anymore.
& I will keep mine too. that I will never leave you again.
I will hold you real tight. cause. I love you.
I will cherish your love for me. never again take it for granted.
I’ll learn to tolerate you. not to be so stubborn & unreasonable anymore.
I will learn to think on your side. Understand your situation.
Even though we might still have lots of argument.
But no matter what. My love for you is true.
I want to be with you always. Don’t you ever suspect my love.
& my love for you will never fade because of that.
remember you said argument is good for relationship. hee. =)
Thanks God that we are still together. I’m proud to have you.
I LOVE YOU! you are my addiction.

January 28th, 2008 by tziaaa

I’m confused.
I trying to let go before I go too deep.
I had once fall hard. I don’t want any 2nd time.

I keep telling myself he is serious to me before that.
I thinks he is sweet enough to come over to my work place just to see me.
Nice to send me sweet messages when I’m down.
Caring enough to buy me my favourite donuts & make sure I eat ‘em.
Kind enough to call me up.
Smart enough to help me in my studies.
Tall enough for me to wear high heels when walking with him.
& I trusted him whenever he said no.

But everytime I failed to see him when I really expecting to see him.
& failed when waiting for his call when I am waiting desperately .
I got disappointed.
worst came to worst.
when
he lied to me.
hiding things from me.
so much of lying and hiding.
what I am for him. Sigh.
I thought I’m the one who supposed to know everything bout him.
& when I realize..
I’m not so important for him anymore.
maybe I’m just not good enough.
In fact, I am bad.
I admit I’m a stubborn, unreasonable, selfidh girlfriend.
I don’t worth his love.
people told me.
” yeah la, he memang like that la.”
” Taylors alot pretty chicks wei. gone la you.”
” He got you happy, lost you also nothing one la. “
I don’t want to trust.
But. I just feel that it is the fact.

Before I ask for IT.
he had never care much to call me up
or maybe come over to look for me.
Instead he spent his time playing pool and else with his friends.

I don’t feel heartbreak anymore.
Just sad and disappointed.
I had touched something that I had anti all the while.
I thought it will help me to feel better.
but useless.
I still feel fucking down.
I smile, I laugh.
You will never know how bad I feel.
but well. I guess I had gave up much earlier.
& Finally, I made my decision today..

But his words touched me & keep holding me back.
I read his blog and made me drop my tears.
I don’t know what should I do.
Should I go back to him.
Spare me sometime.
I’m really confused.
I will definately.
miss his kisses.
miss his hugs.
miss his sweet messages.
miss talking to him.
miss everything.
I’m really afraid I will regret after everything.
Sigh.

January 27th, 2008 by tziaaa

mood : still emo.
tune on – Apologize.

I’m still unhappy today.
though he had apologize a million times.
arghhh. maybe I’m the one being unreasonable huh?
He’s out of credit and unable to call me.
I’m thinking.. He can plan to go to club.
He must has some cash with him right?
Can’t even call me? abit impossible.
fuck.. I am thinking too much.
I tried to message him today.
But everytime I finish typing a message and trying to send it out.
I just cancel it. I don’t want to start another argument with him.
maybe. time is really needed this time.

Thanks Abel for caring so much. =)
Your call really made me feel better.
you are such a nice friend!

I prefer working now.
I can throw away everything when I’m busying.
& with some stupid colleagues that made lots of jokes that made me laugh.
Friends that can keep me accompany.
I hate to be alone.
I’ll be thinking alot.
In fact, too much of useless things. =(
However, I’ll be working till 31st jan only.

oh yeah. and.
There’s someone who using my picture as his primary picture in friendster.
That wasn’t that bad yet huh.
Then…
he told me he will pay me for that & his cousin knows me.
so. He will come to look for me.
wtf. I think’s is damm funny!
and. kinda scary lo.

January 26th, 2008 by tziaaa

Fuck this.
Smokers sux. 

 

I’m supposed to go to the quicksilver revolution party.
But well, i didn’t go.
due to my fuckin emo mood.
I’m so damm angry.
Maybe disappointed will suit more.
He lie to me & hiding things from me.
I seriously don’t feel I’m important for him at all.
One whole day, not even a message from him till I message him.
Even when he know I’m not happy with him. he didn’t message me.
*hey, it’s holiday, don’t tell me busy with college*
….
when I confronted him about what he did,
he keep denying it.
& asked me what’s wrong with me.
He said he don’t know what I really want.
I just want you to be true and honest to me.
is that really so hard for you?
& you had misused my trust towards you.
Don’t blame on others.
You yourself know the best bout what happened.
I still love you.
but. just. too much disappointed.

January 25th, 2008 by tziaaa

Another working day.
today.. I would conclude it as a gossips day.
There’s lots of gossips today =)

 

Mon came to visit me with her cute boyfriend.
I told her he’s cute,
But she thinks I’m just trying to made her happy.
Whatever then.
so envy, those couples can shopping and spend time together.
& my boyfriend.
…
he came, but..
well, less than 10 minutes he left.
we have nothing to talk about.
and me don’t feel like talking to him any longer.
the way he talk is like so different.
I guess he had mixed too much with his so called “BEST FRIEND”
Damm it. I damm don’t like it.
it’s like….
er.. I just don’t know how to explain.
it’s just sux!

Boyfriend use his house phone to call me alot.
we had been argue alot..
and need to settle lots of stuff…
well…
His phone bill is out.
he almost got slaughter by his parents.
I’m Teribbly sorry. 

boyfriend.
I love you still.
but.
I don’t like the way you act and talk now.
It’s so much like HIM.
you know who I mean.

January 24th, 2008 by tziaaa

Looking huge beside this tiny doll.

 

I’m looking fugly here…

smiles =)

 

Pretty, i need a real date with you both =)