December 1st, 2009 by tziaaa

browsing through our old photos, wanted to make you a card. but, things didn’t go right. i failed.
still, looking through those photo of us brought our memories to live.

from the first day I met you till we got together, not long, but those memories are precious. I remember your golden retriever hair which I thought you look really good in it, till, you chopped off your hair and dyed it black. I got very very much in love with your short black hair. I remember how much I felt I was loved, when you stay back at M’sia just for me, and came all the way to Kampar just to pick me up. After spending some time together, i realize, you love me, just because you do and have got no other intention. I know, you are someone for me to lean on.& there’s when, we were official.

The starting our relationship wasn’t good though. You was so ego, and I was so stubborn. Toleration never exist in our dictionary. So many arguments till both us got so sick of  it. & So many times, we almost had this relationship ended. but, the faith of us in each others hold us back. slowly, we learned. We know there’s a reason for why both of us are together, it’s fated.

We started to learn from our mistakes. You are still ego, and I am still as stubborn. But, toleration started to exist. There’s still arguments but things got better and we got closer after every arguments. We learned and promise to do those we promised. It like, we started to fall for each other all over again each time. Also, like what you say, in a relationship, we have to give and take, and I guess, we did it now. & we started to realize, we are both irreplaceable.

Driving down to Kampar every week isn’t easy, but still, you do, just because you want to see me. I am happy, very happy, i wanted to tell you how damm happy am I every time I see you. But, words just went down to the bottom of my heart when you are around me. I guess, I am just a lil too shy. I remember those time when I sulk, you will come out with something to cheer me, so good that I couldn’t resist and smile. The first time we went to Genting theme park together, i sulk that you left me for roller coaster, you then brought me to those con-man fun fair, won a few soft toys to me, just to see me smile again. Also, whenever I cried or breakdown, you will always be there for me without failed. Not forgetting, those breakfast you prepared for me. It’s total ♥. Nevertheless, those surprises and presents given by you, are all priceless. So great that they shan’t be labeled with price.

You told me, I am mean to be pampered because I am your princess that you truly love. Simple words from you are good enough to melts my heart. You later on brought me to meet your family. They treated me so well, that I felt so pampered. and boyfriend, you are the first that my mom acknowledged and approved. hmmm, like yea. I know she likes you too.

Despite all my mistakes, my flaws and those disappointment I gave, I love you more than any others and I am falling for you a lil and a lil deeper day by day. & baby, missing you has become a habit of mine. i just couldn’t kick this habit away.

i love you. ♥

last but not least, happy 6th month anniversary, my precious one.

November 11th, 2009 by tziaaa

我可不可以不勇敢。

因為你，
我接受了無數的考驗，
我接受了無數的眼神，
我得了，無數的傷害。
也得了，無數的疼愛。

你給的愛是我目前的推動力。
但，當那愛平衡不了你所給的傷害時。。。

將會是我跟你道別的那一天。
但圣主，那一天，能不能不到來。

November 11th, 2009 by tziaaa

將傷口包扎，以為那樣就不疼了。
笑著從新面對新的開始。

他回來了，一切不是應該好好的嗎？
但為何我未感到愉快，仍然感到悲傷。

后来發現那一次又一次的離去已讓我遍體鱗傷，
我需要時間復原。

咬緊牙根，堅信著那遍體鱗傷的我也能擁有幸福。
是的，也許我真的有用不盡的勇氣與堅持。

愛情，讓我勇敢了。

November 10th, 2009 by tziaaa

你真的沒變嗎？ 真的是我太敏感了嗎？
還是，這都是善意謊言？

但現在，一切都結束了。
我也得松開雙手，讓一切承諾自由了。

這一刻，我最懷念的是，
你，愛上我的那一刻。

October 8th, 2009 by tziaaa

我很壞，我真的很壞。

那一天，我一時興起和他談起了我的相機夢。 買部新相機吧， 他說。
我起了嘴，因為，我沒那個能力。 他笑了笑，摸了摸我的頭說，相機就由他來買吧！
原先，我不肯。說什么要自己付的，最后，卻被自己的購物狂病態給整了。
他沒說什么，還為我添了幾雙漂亮的鞋子。我笑了，他也笑了。

后來，因某些原因， 逼得他暫時沒辦法為我買先那部相機了。
他很內疚，說要遲些些才能賣給我了。
我卻無緣無故地哭了， 對所有事也都提不起勁。
我以為，他會搖著頭，說我不諒解他。
出乎意外的，他向我道歉，說什么他讓我失望了。
為了讓我開心起來，還帶我去看笑片。

反而是我，沒給他任何正面反應。

回到家以后想想，我忽然感到很慚愧。
他，對我從不會不舍得什么的，只要我喜歡。
他，的心情定于我的喜怒哀樂，只要我快樂。
他，了解我的任性與蠻不講理，只要我滿意。

能像他如此待我的會有幾個？
我，也該珍惜了吧？

想說，寶貝，謝謝你說給的一切。
我很幸福。

-photography credits to SK-

August 18th, 2009 by tziaaa

“情人間常說：「我對你不再有愛，都變成了習慣了。」

其實，習慣並沒有什麼不好。
它讓你自然的去做。
自然的去想他，自然的去愛他。

當你已經不覺得自己在付出時，
也許你覺得，你己開始習慣，有他陪伴在你的生命中，
那才是真的愛。” – Ivan K

閑著沒事， 開始閱讀別人的部落格， 而偶然發現這一篇文章，更被他所寫的這一段給吸引了。
想對他正在質疑我的愛的他說：「也許我對你不再有愛，都變成了習慣了。」

我習慣了早晨起來有你的短訊，
我習慣了對你說我有多想念你，
我習慣了有你陪著我一起發呆，
我習慣了有你牽著我的手逛街，
我習慣了你那樣傻傻地看著我，
我習慣了在睡前聽聽你的聲音，

我已習慣有你。愛你，也成了我戒不掉的習慣。

你質疑我的愛， 我慌了， 我累了，我無力和你爭。

我問是否我不夠好，你說你要改變我。那一刻，我頹廢了。
人何來的完美。 我不完美，你也是如此，但我接受了，為何你不能。
和你在一起，不是一兩年的兒游戲， 是一輩子的事，難道說這一輩子我都不能做回我自己了嗎？

你問我為你做了些什么？ 你不提，我也忘了。
但仔細想想，好像，不少。至少，對你的一切承諾我都遵守了。
只是，你的眼睛被疑惑給蒙住了，你什么都看不見了。
反倒是你，一次又一次的食言了，我什么都沒說。只是，心在淌血。

是的，我不開心了； 天也下起雨了。
但我相信，雨后有晴天，一切都會好起來的。

=）

photography credits to kevinhan

July 11th, 2009 by tziaaa

我，不開心了。
卻忘了怎么流淚哭泣，只會，傻傻的笑。

我有爸爸那嚴肅卻溫馨的愛；
我有媽媽包容我的淚水與任性；
我有妹妹在我的臉上劃上笑容；
我有弟弟和我分享那愛的喜悅；
我有他給予我多一份童話般的愛；

該快樂了吧？該幸福了吧？
曾經以為上天把愛全都留給了我。
在我想要與你分享時，發現，上天把你給沒收了。

那一刻，我的心哭了。

曾經一起暢談心事的你、我、她已不再了。
同樣的地方，同樣的人，卻因不同的時間，而有著不同的感受。
此刻此時，我們顯得莫明的陌生，也多了一份虛為。
壓抑著我的情緒，很虛偽的，我笑了。

忽然發現，我們之前的約定，似乎都已消失了。
記得你說過，即使我們不是同年同月同日生，
卻說好了要同年同月同日完成我們的人生大事，
你說過就忘了的話，我都牢牢記住了。

我努力了，也很想繼續努力下去，但還是會無力。
十年的友情，我留不住了。 慶幸的是，我曾今擁有過。

人生，似乎，真的沒有完美。

photography credits to kevinhan.